Living out of an overnight bag, food shopping for two flats and attempting to squash your entire toiletries collection onto one tiny shelf in your boyfriend’s bathroom – sound familiar? Inevitably, the endless backwards and forwards of living separately from your significant other will take its toll, and you’ll decide to take the plunge and live in an apartment that you both live in!
But making the adjustment from bachelor/single lady to live-in-lovers can be tricky; wardrobe space, clutter and shaving foam on the sink are just a few of the problems facing newly co-habiting couples.
But never fear, if you’re moving in together: Six simple steps to domestic bliss will see you through!
His Place/Her Place/Our Place
The first hurdle to overcome is deciding exactly where the two of you are going to live in great harmony (hopefully). Whether you decide to move into one of your respective homes or find a whole new place, you need to be clear from the start that you are living together as equals and all house related decisions need to be agreed upon!
Yes, it used to be his bachelor pad, but now it’s your love nest so the zebra print rug needs to go.
It’s often a better idea to start a fresh rather than move into one or the other apartment, as this will avoid bad feeling when he has to get rid of his beer-chiller to make room for your handbags. Obviously accessories trump alcohol, but he probably won’t see it this way…
Wardrobe Space
In your own place you probably had a room with a wardrobe all to yourself (and ample chairs to throw your overspill of clothes onto).
However, now you’re sharing the master bedroom and you somehow have to fit two rooms worth of clothes into one. This is by no means an easy feat, especially since your boyfriend seems to have accumulated more pairs of jeans in the past two years of your relationship that you currently own.
The key word here? Compromise. Do you really need those Havaiana flip flops in every colour? Could he go without a couple of those novelty ties? These are the sorts of questions that can save a hell of a lot of space (and ultimately, your relationship!)
If you really can’t let go of some belongings, then consider renting out a small storage space where you can both put things until you find a place for them. Alternatively, you could temporarily lend things out to willing friends and family!
Clean Up Bad Habits
A boy’s bathroom is notoriously dirty – but now it’s your bathroom too – so shaving foam on the sink and little razor hairs clustered near the plug are not what you want to be waking up to. Equally, your hundreds of bottles of beauty product, shower gel and conditioners for every type of hair day are likely to cause friction.
To combat this, have a chat before you move in about how you’re both going to make an effort to keep bad habits at bay. Have a cleaning rota where you both tidy away your stuff and wash away bathroom nasties.
Oh, and make it obligatory that the toilet seat must always be put down after use – because some things are non-negotiable.
Learn to Share
However perfect you are for each other, agreeing on every single thing is not realistic nor is it healthy. Housework, cooking duties and what to watch on TV are all common points of contention for couples living together.
Finding a happy compromise and meeting in the middle on all of these things is the key to a harmonious household. For example, if he lets you choose the takeaway, then it’s only fair he gets to pick dessert. He gets to watch Super Sunday and Match of the Day, but only if you get to sit down to Made in Chelsea on a Monday night with no complaints.
A Problem Shared…
Bottling up any issues you encounter living with your partner will just lead to them escalating and most likely coming to the surface in a big, blow-out argument – and no one wants that.
Simply pledge to mention whatever is bothering you as soon as you notice it. If your boyfriend uses the same knife for both the butter and the jam, and this bothers you, then say something!
Chances are he doesn’t realise what he’s doing is upsetting you – and once he does – will endeavour not to make the same mistake again.
Finances
Whilst there’s no doubt you trust your partner implicitly if you’ve agreed to live together, if you’re not legally married it’s a good idea to keep your bank accounts separate.
Sit down before moving day and make a finance plan including bills, food shopping and other household utilities. If you have a similar salary you might want to split everything 50/50, however if one of you earns significantly more than the other then this is another consideration you might want to keep in mind.
So follow our six simple steps to domestic bliss and you never know – you might even enjoy the compromise?! (At least until you can afford a bigger place with a man cave built in the basement).
